Keep Your Head High
So let’s talk about how to build our self-confidence, even when,
The ups and downs keep coming.
Sometimes life gives us so much heartbreak.
But as Arianna Huffington mentioned in her book strive, let’s remember to live life like everything is rick in our favor.
So no matter all the challenges, stay strong, stay confident.
That gets you a step closer to achieving your dreams.
The Bright side of building your self-esteem and confidence
Building self-esteem and confidence might be challenging but very beneficial.
So before we dive into the various ways in which we can develop this confidence, let’s get inspired to work for it, with a list of some few benefits of self-confidence.
- People are more attracted to self-confident people.
- Being self- confidence gets you the job and clients you desire.
- It inspires you to go for the dreams you only dreamed about.
- When you are self- confident, you will be more productive because you will be strongly inspired to work hard. You will waste no time because you are very confident of achieving your dreams if you put in the work.
- When you are self-confident, you turn to make the right decisions. Not decisions which come from fear.
How to build your self-esteem and confidence
Okay, now we are all spurred up, let’s proceed to know how to attain this fulfilling state of mind.
1. Respect yourself
I strongly believe the way we treat and feel about ourselves has an impact on the way other people treat us.
And the way we allow other people to treat us has an effect on our self-esteem or confidence level.
Yes, our goal is to have a self-esteem and confidence level which is not determined by others.
( We can’t let anyone have that kind of power over us).
But sometimes we stay in situations or relationships for so long in which people treat us like garbage.
If we respect ourselves enough and know you deserve to be treated with much more respect than you are being given, then we will be more inspired to get out of the situation, even though it may be really hard.
For the longer we stay in that situation, the more our self-esteem and confidence level suffers.
The main point is just respecting yourself enough to get out of situations which have a negative effect on our self-esteem and confidence.
It could be a relationship, a job, a lifestyle, and so much more.
2. Not quitting on your dreams
When we give up on our dreams, a thought which goes through or mind frequently is
we can’t do it, it’s impossible.
We tell ourselves, we don’t have what it takes to make it.
We tell ourselves we are not good enough or lucky enough.
This is really terrible for our self-esteem and confidence.
Achieving what you set out to do, makes you believe in your capabilities.
Needless to say, this goes a long way to builds our self-esteem and confidence.
3. Look people in the eye
Looking people in the eye is something which has always been scary.
There is something about eye contact, which makes us feel so self-conscious and uncomfortable.
So we can say this is not our comfort zone.
But what we will come to realize as we begin looking people in the eye is, like anything we do repeatedly it becomes easier.
One of the effects of doing something with ease which we once found scary or uncomfortable is an increase in our self-esteem and confidence.
An added bonus to this is that people will also begin to see in us a confident person.
You are not afraid to look them in the eyes, that’s very bold.
People will also find you more likable, as this means you pay attention to them.
Some people even find a lack of eye contact a sign of insincerity, dishonesty, and impoliteness.
4. Have uncomfortable conversations
Like eye contact, this is really scary to do but very advantageous.
We often find ourselves trying to shy away from uncomfortable conversations.
Most times these conversations get us closer to people.
These uncomfortable conversations are essential in business, relationships and so much more.
Yes, it’s easier to avoid them altogether.
But doing things which lead us to greater heights of success either in business or relationships, though scary will help us increase our self-esteem and confidence.
5. Stay United with Positive beliefs
Our beliefs are a part of us.
They either make us stronger or weaker.
If I believe I can do anything I set my mind towards.
I go out every day and I work hard with that believe at the back of my mind.
No matter the happenings on the way which might make me believe I might never succeed.
I will definitely achieve.
This will really help our self-esteem and confidence.
Also believing in something is very important.
Some people are religious, some are not.
But one of the most admirable thing about religious people is the confidence they have in what they can do.
A very common phrase in religious gatherings is ” I can do anything through God who strengthens me ”
6. Dress the part
When I dress expensive, I feel expensive
I don’t think this is just me.
When I really love and admire my outfit, I feel so confident.
Also, remember dressing appropriately really matters to help you feel like you belong.
Wearing a suit to the beach or swimsuit for a job interview, though they might be expensive, it is a bad choice and won’t help our confidence and self-esteem levels.
7. Speak even when you are scared
Here is another scary situation to help build your self-esteem and confidence level.
Saying what you wanted to say, despite all the fears you have, sends a message to yourself which is,
I don’t shy away from being heard no matter how much it scares me about how they might receive what I say.
This increases your courage.
Hence your self-esteem and confidence.
8. Take Note of your achievements
When you start losing your confidence as you see your friends and classmates achieving new heights in life.
You may start feeling like your life has been stagnant.
First of all, comparing ourselves to others is never a good idea.
This really has an effect on your self-esteem and confidence.
One thing we must remind ourselves of is that we all have different roads to travel at different speeds.
Secondly, your life is not at a standstill.
Just look around, some things have changed, you or the world might not consider it as significant as getting married or getting a high paying job but every positive change is important.
What we need to do is practice gratitude.
Make a least of what you are grateful for, nothing is too small to be left out of the list.
Taking note of these achievements puts you in a confident state of mind.
A state of mind which is ready to go out there and achieve more.
9. Exercise and meditate ( work on your body and soul)
Exercising gets you steps closer to the body and health you want.
Meditating works on the mind.
With meditation, you get to know yourself.
You get to know your strengths and weakness.
You get to reflect on ways to eliminate your weaknesses.
And you learn to see the bright side of the some of the flaws you can’t change.
All these go a long way to build your self-esteem and confidence.
10. Kill negative thoughts.
Negative can really lead to nothing positive.
Negative thoughts about ourselves only reduce our self-esteem and confidence.
Negative thoughts about others are mostly a reflection of our own shortcomings.
So it will be best for ourselves and everyone around us to kill the negative thoughts.
True sometimes we have these thoughts frequently and sometimes it feels like we can’t control them.
From experience, I realized I have less negative thoughts when my mind is not on autopilot.
That is if I practice mindfulness.
The secret is just to focus on our present environment.
- The road we are moving on,
- The movement of our toothbrush in our mouth,
- The taste of the food we are eating
- And so much more.
11. Do what you say you will do
You will also want to build your confidence in yourself.
A good motto is ” when I say I will do something, I will do it ”
Keep your promises to yourself and others.
This will reduce your fear of not going through with what you set your mind on.
Why cause you said you will do it.
This will go a long way to build the confidence you have in yourself and your words.
And as a bonus, it will also increase the confidence others have in you.
You will become trustworthy.
Go Be legendary
Now we know some benefits and how to build self-esteem and confidence, it’s time for us to take action.
No matter how challenging it may be.
It will all be worth it when we are able to achieve our wildest dreams due to a simple character shift.
If you are a self-development enthusiast like myself and will love to share some tips or ask some questions, please feel free to do so in the comments below.